Hail, Hail go away

The weather is so weird today. It was blue skies, then hail, then wind, then blue skies, then more wind, and finally bring on the hail once again.

Today is the perfect day to be on the couch, drinking hot chocolate, eating ice cream and watching movies. Or HGTV, I seriously love that channel. Gives me such inspiration. To bad inspiration isn't enough to get off the couch...

Instead, I'm here at work listening to the hail hit my truck. (Yessss, I love when it hail's on my truck.) As you can imagine, each individual piece of hard snow/ice I see/ hear hit my truck deepens my mood.
Although, I will go home (after practice) jump in the shower and use ALL the hot water. And I mean ALL of it. Grab a bowl of ice cream, cereal, or maybe even Cream of Wheat?? HMMM
Then I will plunk my butt on the couch and not move until I go to bed. (Oh, wait. This is happening after I feed the chickens. I wish they would feed themselves)

I'm not making ANY dinner unless you would like cream of wheat. I'm not doing ANY night calving. And the laundry can kiss off.
Tonight it's all about me the food and the tv.

Of course, what are the chances of my evening really going like this?
My luck the dog will run away.
Or the power will go out. (I might go up in flames if this happens)

Sidenote:
First day of basketball practice was a success. No one died or cried.
I even had a little boy run up to me and say "Do you know So and So?"
I looked at him like he was nuts and replied "Who? Um no..."
Little boy then replied "Well, he likes you. He like LOVES you."

The basketball girls started laughing and I stood there dumbfounded.
I still don't know what I would say to that little boy if he confronted me again.
Do you think a boy who wants to get attention by walking through the gym as if one of his legs is broken and is yelling "Oh, mah broken legggg. OHHHH, OHHH" Is a good match for me? Are we compatible?
Yeah I didn't think so either.

Please. Just Humor Me.

Okay seriously I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. I'm sitting at my desk crying.I'm a loser and I need to find myself a life! But just read it and see if you can keep from laughing! Enjoy!

Dear Dawn,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but Our affair is over. I think I realized it When I quoted Forest Gump In your car and I saw you Sitting on The Montreal Canadians goalie. I'm sure you're Middle-class enough to understand That I may pee my pants. I'm returning Your love letters to me to you, but I'll keep The oil tank from your car as a memory. You should also know that I Told in my confession today about the moose poaching and Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird.

You should get that embarrassing rash checked,
Christine



Pick a friend, any friend.
Answer the following questions and fill in the answers into the fun paragraph below.
Then repost it.Have fun!!

Dear _______,
I don't really know how to tell you this, ___1____. I think I realized it ___2___ ___3___ and I saw you ___4___ ___5___. I'm sure you're ___6___ enough to understand ___7___. I'm returning ___8___ to you, but I'll keep ___9___ as a memory. You should also know that I ___10___ and ___11___.

_____12_____,




1.What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White - I'm joining the Convent
Black - I dislike your eyelashes
Green - Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a pervert
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're mean
Other - I'm in love with your cat


2.Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February - Last year when you peed your pants
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on the little dog
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - When you put cuffs on me
July - When you smacked my ass
August - When I saw the purple monkey
September - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
October - When I quoted Forest Gump
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I finally changed my underwear

3.Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Lasagna- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Chicken - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Christien
Fish - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light


4.What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Hit on
Red - Insult
Black - Ignore
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - Put whipped cream on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sitting on
Other - Drive over


5.What's the color of your underwear?
Green - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey - The Catholic Priest
Black - Your My Little Pony collection
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red - My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink - The Montreal Canadian's goalie
None - My prized statue of Michael Jackson in the nude
Other - The elephant in the corner

6.What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs - Man
O.C- Emotional
One Tree Hill - Open
Heroes - Frostbitten
Lost - High
House - Sly
Simpsons - cowardly
Grey's Anatomy - Scarred
Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Senile
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat - Ashamed

7.Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Confused- That Santa doesn't exist
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed - That were related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Bored- That you need a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
Silly - That there is no solution to you being a dumbass
Other - That your driving sucks

8.What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White -Your Back Street Boys blanket
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - Your Elton John poster
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from Vegas
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your toe ring
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your car

9.The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your photo with the mustache drawn on it
C/D - The oil tank from your car
E/F - Your neighbor's dog
G/H - My virginity
I/J - The results of that blood-sample
K/L - Your left ear
M/N - Your love letters
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - Your glass eye
Y/Z - Your credit cards

10.The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
C/D - Mocked you constantly behind your back
E/F - Always wanted to break your legs
G/H - Hate your cooking
I/J - Never will forget that night
K/L - Will tell the authorities that you did steal that whale in the back yard
M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
O/P - Was interviewed about the car you stole
Q/R - Always will remember the pep talks
S/T - Get sick when I think of your feet
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Haven't showered in a month
Y/Z - Am better off without you

11.What do you prefer to drink?
Water- Our friendship is ruined
Beer - you should stop picking your nose
Flavored water - I'm off to lead a new life as a nun
Soda - I will haunt you when I'm incarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Wine -Thanks for the Cocaine
Cider - I have a passionate interest for men
Juice - I love Oprah Winfrey
Mineral water - You should get that embarrassing rash checked
Hot chocolate - Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Diet Soda - You ruined my attempts at another world war
Other - I'm scratching my ass as you read this

12.To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm tingly sensations
Italy - Best of luck on the sex-change
England - Kiss my ass
Spain - Go drown yourself
China - You make me sick
Germany - Go milk a cow
Japan - Please don't hurt me
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
Australia -You should get that embarrassing rash checked
Egypt - Good luck in jail
France - With tears of sadness

Now, FILL IT IN ..